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Jan
11
Acting Interested In Others
Filed Under Relationships, Social Skills | Leave a Comment
You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you. ~ Dale Carnegie
Acting interested in other people and what they have to say may or may not be a social skill in itself, but it is important step in a variety of other social skills. If you are truly listening to what someone has to say then you must convey this by acting interested.
Dale Carnegie lists as number one in his “Six steps to Make People Like You” that you must “Become genuinely interested in other people.” If you become more interested in people then you’ll naturally become a better listener. Carnegie also relates that you must also do the following:
2 Smile.
3 Remember that a man’s name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4 Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5 Talk in the terms of the other person’s interest.
6 Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.
It becomes easier find out what someone is really passionate about and to dispel negative assumptions that can mess up the communication when you are truly interested in what another person has to say. By listening you may find many similarities between one another and also learn to appreciate the differences.
When you operate as a good listener you will be a positive and pleasant exception among the others who are only waiting for their turn to talk again.
Pay attention to others and you will make them feel good because of the attention, and validating them and their interests. That is how connections are made.
There is no such thing on earth as an uninteresting subject; the only thing that can exist is an uninterested person. ~ G. K. Chesterton (1874 – 1936)
Mar
5
Christian the friendly lion
Filed Under Friendship | 2 Comments
Here is video proof that friendship is just not a human connection and that animals can remember!!!
Sep
3
Components of Trust
Filed Under Trust | Leave a Comment
Who is that you trust? Do you know why you trust them? How do you go about developing trust from others? Several psychologists define trust based on the components that they believe make up trust. As someone who studies human behavior I happen to agree with these findings and the definition.
What components of trust are believed to make up the definition of trust and how may developing these key components empower both your personal and business relationships?
The first component that I will mention in this article is competence. Competence is defined in the dictionary as ‘the quality of being adequately or well qualified physically and intellectually’. Competence means that you will be able to give correct information and are also able to perform a task efficiently. You wouldn’t expect someone with a fifth grade education to do brain surgery as it is something that they aren’t trained to do, or are intellectually capable of. Are you capable of doing what you attest to be able to do?
The second component of trust to be mentioned in this article is predicability, that is the quality of being predictable. If somoeone is usually on time for work or constantly tells you that they will do something and they carry through on that they are predictable in respect to these behaviors. Therefore, as long as they carry through with the same behaviors there will be no unpleasant surprises. I have a web based program that can be used to look up the definition of any word and one of the definitions of trust that I found certainly supports this component of trust. That definition is ‘certainty based on past experience’. Predictability can go two ways. One is positive: “Bill is predicable as we can always expect him to show up at work on time.” Secondly, is a negative example: “John, is going to get fired as he is always ten minutes late for work.”
The third component of trust to be mentioned is benevolence. Benevolence has been defined as a ‘disposition to do good’ and an ‘an act intending or showing kindness and good will’. Benevolence is about doing what is in somebody’s best interest. Sometimes this means that you might have to deny someone something. A case in point would be having a friend who is an alcoholic and financially destitute asking you to supply them alcohol. It is in their best interest that you deny doing such a thing for them.
The fourth and last component of trust is honesty. Honesty is simply defined as ‘the quality of being honest’. Honesty has both been defined as ‘not disposed to cheat or defraud; not deceptive or fraudulent’ and as ‘worthy of being depended on’. Honesty is a matter of truth, and is defined as marked by truth. It means that what you say is accurate and that you aren’t fabricating what you are telling them. They definitely do not want to be friends or business associates with someone who is dishonest or who lies to them.
Because of the various backgrounds and life experiences of different individuals the amount of time to develop a trusting relationship varies. It is also true that people who are trustworthy are more quickly able to detect other people with the same traits. Fortunately or unfortunately many trustworthy people want to believe in the innate goodness of human kind and therefore sometimes give people chances to be trustworthy to the point of jeopardizing themselves and being vulnerable to many unpleasant experiences. Giving people these chances to prove themselves is good, however, you must be wary and ready to respond as sometimes these situations have a way of backfiring.
Someone may not trust you now; however, that doesn’t mean that by expressing these four components of trust, that they won’t learn to trust you. Earning trust and developing trust both happen by degree and unfortunately in both there can be setbacks at times. However, as in any worthwhile endeavor one must continue to strive for perfection. Whether you are trying to develop a relationship of trust with another person or in business dealings you must first earn trust. Once you have earned trust the reputation for you being trustworthy will spread.
Keith Stieneke is the webmaster and administrator of http://www.your-personal-best.com, http://www.opportunityassistance.com, http://www.blogsmart-resources.com, http://www.article-database.com, and http://www.marketing6s.com. He is an accomplished writer and blogger with several articles published online.
(You may link to this article or copy it in full to post to your website or publication as long as you leave the byline intact).
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