This blog post begins the start of a new category that will overlap with other categories. That category is called social skills and is best described by the definition given at www.businessdictionary.com as the ability to communicate, persuade, and interact with other members of the society, without undue conflict or disharmony.

According to Henrik Edberg at http://www.positivityblog.com there are at a minimum at least eight basic tips on social skills that have been used successfully over and over throughout thousands of years.

One of the most basic social skills or component of social skills is to listen to another person or persons.

The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them. ~ Ralph Nichols

Because people are often centered upon themselves and this being a part of human nature listening is probably one of the least appreciated social skills. Unfortunately most people are just used to talking about themselves or waiting for the other person to finish so they can start talking again. I have noticed that a majority of people, myself included, fall into this category.

Listening is about much more than hearing the words that come out of another person’s mouth. It is about showing interest in what the other person is saying and taking the time to understand what is being said. Rajesh Setty, who is a friend and business associate of mine, mentions that active listening is often overlooked for several reasons such as ego, lack of knowledge, not being able to handle silence, amongst other reasons. Because of this people focus on talking rather than listening.

Henrik states to get past this he has found that it is important to just forget about yourself and focus your attention outward during a conversation rather than inward. In other words place the mental focus on the person you are talking and listening to instead of on yourself. This makes you less self-centered and your need to be in the spotlight diminishes.

When you actually listen to what people are saying it also becomes easier to find potential paths in the conversation. By asking what are known as open-ended questions – those that will give you more than a yes or no answer, you can explore these paths and have more interesting conversations.

You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time.— M. Scott Peck

Many times I have referred to Rajesh Setty in this blog, especially referring to information from his book Beyond Code, Learn to distinguish yourself in 9 simple steps!

Rajesh sent me his new book, upbeat, Cultivating the right attitude to thrive in tough times, a few months ago.

When I reviewed Beyond Code, I did it as excerpts relating to personal development. Although, there was a great deal of information in upbeat, that could be related to personal development, I decided for the time being rather than to review the book based upon each concept and idea presented to review it in its entirety. The review that I wrote is published on Facebook.

You can also read more about this book at http://www.rajeshsetty.com/resources/books/upbeat/

Change is difficult but often essential to survival.  – Les Brown

Sometimes we must make permanent changes in the way we deal with and view certain parts of our lives such as dealing with relationships, weight management, money management and so on. This short blog post is about the main component essential to these changes, that being responsibility.

Making permanent changes in your life requires responsibility. Otherwise that change will be temporary.

That responsibility according to personal development guru Anthony Robbins is done only by accepting three core beliefs:

1). Believing we must change is not enough, it must change.
2). You must be responsible in other words say I must change it, and
3). I created what I’m experiencing, therefore I can change it.

Change your thoughts and you change your world. – Norman Vincent Peale

I am attempting to add this blog to MyLot in order to get more exposure. To do this I must make a post about it.

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